Memorial Weekend

We enjoyed a long weekend in Kansas for Memorial Day. I got to relax and have fun while Brendan worked his you know what off.

A month ago Brendan and his brother, Brook, were discussing what to give their dad for his birthday. His mom and dad have wanted to build a pergola over their back patio for several years, so the brother's decided to help build it for their dad's gift.  Brook flew in from Georgia and brought his son Shepherd. The guys worked all day Friday and finished up Saturday night at 10p.m.  It looks awesome! I think they had a good time together bonding. With all of us spread out over the country it's not often they get together to work on a project. Here are a few pictures:

Progress at End of Day 1

The Williams' Boys

The Finished Project

Eliana and I were excited that she got to meet one of her 9 cousins for the first time! Shepherd is 7 years old and was such a great help with his little cuz and was really good at playing with her. Grandma got all of Ellie's daddy's old hot wheels and other toys out to play with. Both Shepherd and Eliana had fun with them.

Playing with Daddy's Old Toys
(anyone recognize the Pound Puppy's?)

He was very proud of his Hot Wheel's Parking Lot

Playing with Hot Wheel's

Battleship with Grandma

Messy Sweet Potato Girl

On Saturday Eliana got to go to the Zoo for the first time! She loved it and did so good! We went to Rolling Hills Wildlife Adventure in Hays, Kansas.  Its a smaller Zoo, but was so nice and clean! I highly recommend it if you are ever in the Salina, Kansas area.

The Cousins

Scary Mountain Lion!

Hmmm, I think we need to see the Monkey's Mom.

Oh, this sweet girl just melts my heart!

She passed out on the tram ride!

Sacked out little girl!

It was so fun to meet Uncle Brook and Cousin Shepherd! Eliana can't wait to meet all her other cousins and Aunt!

Williams Family Camping Adventure

We just returned from our little family's first camping trip, and boy was it memorable! We have been wanting to go camping for some time now, but last summer was not an option for this preggo momma since I started having back pain at around 8 weeks with Eliana.  You might be thinking, wait your pregnant now.  Yes...yes I am.  I told Brendan, we better go camping now or its going to be a while. Originally I agreed to "primitive" camp. Primitive in my dictionary means no bathroom facilities. That's been my criteria from the beginning, as long as they have running water and a bathroom, I'll go camping. My new preggo citeria is that I must have a bathroom and an air mattress. Don't misunderstand me, I enjoy camping, but we both realized that camping is A LOT different with a baby.

Camping Lesson #1: Bring a pac and play, so baby can be mobile in a confined space!

We ended up taking our little brood to Indian Cave State Park in Southeast Nebraska along the Missouri River.  This park was so pretty! I couldn't believe I was still in Nebraska. There were lots of trees, valleys and beautiful views. I highly recommend taking a drive to this park, I know we will go back!

So we arrived on Friday around 3 in the afternoon, hoping to claim one of the 10 tent sites with electricity. There was only one other camper when we arrived. This is a campers delight (or at least my husbands) because privacy is key to an enjoyable camping experience....or so we learned. Out of the 30 surrounding campsites, wouldn't you know another family decided to pick the spot right next to ours. I won't complain too much, but let's just say I learned all the kids names (because of their parents yelling at them CONSTANTLY), I realized you can tell a lot about a person by the tone in their voice, and I love my family. :)

Williams Campsite

My New Nemisis
I.HATE.TICKS! Shortly after we arrived and setup our campsite, I spread out a blanket under a tree for Eliana to roll around on. I sat down with her and discovered tick after tick after tick on the blanket and on my BABY!!!! These suckers were huge! Fortunately I found them all before they bit her. Our poor Dog found the majority of the ticks. On the first night I had just got in bed and was laying there. I thought I felt a leaf or piece of grass on my back so I picked it off and just to be sure got my flashlight and discovered it was a Mammoth Tick!

Camping Lesson #2: Bring tweezers to remove ticks

Our First Miserable Night
So after the discovery of my little tick friend, I think I laid there for an hour feeling like there were bugs crawling all over me! We also were freezing! I'm not sure if the temperature was lower than expected or we are just weenies. So we froze the whole night. Then Eliana woke up and wouldn't go back to sleep unless in bed with us. The next morning we joked it was the worst night of sleep we ever had....or so we thought.

Camping Lesson #3: Bring your sleeping bags, just in case.

Exploring
There is a lot of history at Indian Cave State Park, what they are most known for is the cave with ancient petroglyphs. We drove through the park and arrived at the cave. We couldn't take Ruger up to the cave so I took Ellie to explore the "cave" while Brendan stayed with the dog.

That is the "Cave" behind us

Missouri River near the Cave

There are two landings you stand on to look at the petroglyphs carved into the side of the cave/cliff.  Unfortunately, over time people have made their own mark on the cave and it was really hard to find the petroglyphs through the "So&so loves so&so" and "Dave was here" carvings. We didn't get the chance to hike any trails but wish we could have, I'm sure they were beautiful. There is also a great area of history about a small Indian Trading Post, including a log cabin and one-room school house.  We didn't get to explore since we had a sleeping baby in the car. Also along this road is a beautiful scenic view of the Missouri River.

The Second Miserable (and scary) Night
All week they had been predicting storms for the weekend, but we've learned to take everything the weathermen say with a grain of salt. We tried to keep updated on the weather with our phone apps, and knew there was a possibility of a rainstorm Saturday night. We were so tired from the night before that we got in our tent at 8:30. We put Eliana to bed on her pallet around 9 and then we went to sleep around 10.  Of course, since I'm pregnant an hour later I had to go to the bathroom. I couldn't go back to sleep after that, the wind seemed to pick and I was getting concerned. Around 12:25 I woke Brendan up just as this huge thunderstorm blew in! It was crazy windy and pouring rain. I scooped Ellie up off her pallet just in case our tent collapsed, I didn't want to go searching for her. Brendan was literally holding on to the top of our tent because he thought we were going to have lift off! The really bad storm lasted for about 15 minutes and our baby pretty much slept through it all.  Of course I had to make a run for the bathroom in between storms. It basically rained all night, although it wasn't as bad as the first storm. Our tent withstood the storm! No damage and no water leakage! Our neighbors didn't fare so well, they spent the night in their cars when the wind took off their rain guard. I was so exhausted that I slept most of the rest of the night, but poor Brendan didn't sleep much at all.  He slept the rest of the night on his back with his glasses on worried that we might have to run for the car at some point.

Camping Lesson #4: Get a weather radio

Sunday morning we woke up and both agreed to not fix breakfast but just pack up and head home. We were so ready for showers, no bugs, bed, and a real roof over our heads.

We had quite the adventure and enjoyed our time together as a family, here are a few other photos from our trip.

Just Chilln'

Outdoor Kitchen

Master Griller Hard at Work

Our little Family

I love them!

Hi Papa!

And this is why I'm always laughing. She makes the funniest faces!

First swing ride

To the Mommy's at Heart

As my first Mother's Day approaches I've had many thoughts on Motherhood. First of all, I'm so grateful to be a mommy to the sweetest, most precious, energetic, funny, adorable little 8 month old girl that I am blessed to call my daughter. Second, I have a new appreciation and sincere thankfulness for my mom. Both for how she cared for and raised me when I was younger and now how she helped me when Eliana was born and how she loves on my daughter when we are together.

Lastly, I remember the not so great feelings that Mother's Day brought up in the past. Mother's Day is a reminder to some women of their deepest heart's desire to be a mommy and the fact that no matter what they do their arms are still empty.  The past couple of weeks my heart has been heavy for these women and their husbands who struggle with infertility. Our journey through infertility didn't last as long as it has for some. Only 2 years, but I remember the ache of just wanting a baby of our own to rock to sleep at night, to hold in my arms and stare at for as long as I wanted, to be able to see my husband hold our sleeping child. I remember the excitement of finding out we were pregnant and the unexplainable grief when there was no heartbeat on the ultrasound. I know my husband remembers the nights in bed hearing me try to hide my crying (again) and holding me close because that was the only way he knew how to comfort me.

Several times this week I've heard the song Blessings by Laura Story on the radio. This song has a special place in my heart. The first time I heard it I was driving home after getting lab work done that would basically tell us if we had definitely lost our first baby. Here is just a portion of the song, the chorus and last verse:

'Cause what if your blessings come through rain drops

What if your healing comes through tears

What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near

What if my greatest disappointments or the aching of this life

Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can't satisfy

What if trials of this life

The rain, the storms, the hardest nights

Are your mercies in disguise

Obviously I needed to hear this at that time. No matter what we are going through, it is part of God's will for our life. Trials are blessings, maybe not visible at the time you are going through them, but if you are a true believer in Jesus Christ and trust Him, you will see the blessing. You will come to understand His grace, mercy and peace if you seek Him through the trial.

These are not exactly memories I desire to relive, but its important for me to remember. I know what the Lord brought us through was not just a, "and this too shall pass" moment. Yes we may not battle with infertility today, but all of those tears and triumphs were for a greater purpose. As believers in a Sovereign God we must give Him glory! And we do! We give Him glory for the grace He bestowed on us through times when I have no other explanation for the peace we had. We give Him glory for others we have been able to Biblically encourage because of what He brought us through. We give Him glory for teaching us through His Word how to trust Him and His will.  We give Him glory for our precious Eliana and the unexpected blessing of the child I now carry.

Even though I've been through infertility, I sometimes find it difficult to know how to encourage other women who are going through this trial. I remember that words just sometimes didn't cut it. I appreciated the kindness, sensitivity and encouragement from others, but the only thing that really brought me comfort was scripture.

"You are good and what you do is good, teach me your decrees." 

Psalm 119:68

After we miscarried, a friend of mine who had miscarried several times, told me that when I was reading the Bible to underline, date and notate any verse that the Lord used to encourage me specifically about the baby we lost. That was some of the best advice, because I go back and reference those verses often to share with others. Now when I read the bible and I come across one of those verses, it is a reminder of the Lord's goodness and sovereignty.

"Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we 

may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need."

Hebrews 4:16

I pray the Lord uses this post to encourage those whose arms are empty on this Mother's day. I also hope that it gives some perspective to others who might know someone struggling through infertility.  If you are walking through your own journey of infertility and feel comfortable enough to share, I would love to pray with you and for you. To read more about our struggle and blessings with infertility read this post.